Allan, do you drive a car? Really? I’m astonished that you persist in this noxious habit that requires guzzling petroleum to a degree that has ravaged the planet and contributed to the current climate change crisis.

Your risk of dying in a car crash? 1 in 103.

Or maybe you’re a pedestrian. Good grief! Get back inside! Your risk of dying just increased to 1 in 553. If you walk every day for a year and a bit, it could be curtains for you.

It’s a good thing you can’t walk and drive at the same time! Jeepers!

And yet, here I am, safely at home, smoking, and generous enough with my time to gift you with a bit of well-meaning concern between bouts of my misplaced hysteria.

Seriously, I wonder — as someone who is struggling with quitting smoking, and not “all worked up” about Covid-19 but very much cognizant of my increased risk due to my habit — just exactly what it is that you get from sharing this. Is it just another expression of that “everyone has to have someone to feel better than?” that makes the world go round?

And let’s be honest. These people you mention, the all worked up hysterical unaware smoking overeating people, the silly billys — Oh, I’m sure there’s a few in reality, but admit it, they’re really just part of that cohort in our brains, the perfectly awful specimens that we trot out when we want to have a good old “ain’t it awful” session.

Don’t reduce real humans struggling with poor health, overweight or addictions to pillars against which you can measure and comfort yourself with how much better you’re doing. We’re really more aware — and doing better — than you think.

in Schadenfreude,

DR